You’ve found many ways to occupy yourself in the shower. But once the hot water’s gone, your roommates are left wondering what you’ve done to steam up the loo.

Next time you exit the bathroom, don’t let housemates give you dirty ...

Ever since your car broke down, you’ve been lugging groceries around on foot, schlepping yourself to the el in the rain, and hitting the bars a little bit harder (at least there’s one positive to not driving).

But now you’re cranky, ...

Despite the change in seasons (sort of), you’re still chilling with your toes exposed — sneaking out in last season’s peep-toe pumps, shivering through the evening in a pair of strappy shoes.

Too bad your summer pedicure regime has fallen ...

At 3 a.m. you repaint your living room.

At 4 a.m. you give the cat a bath. (Who knew insomnia would make you so productive?)

But at 8 a.m. you ask for cream rinse instead of creamer, and by 8:15 ...

You could care less about “tired, dry winter skin.”

Hell, if you wanted some flush in your cheeks, you’d just sip the Johnnie Walker in your flask and hit the dance floor at Hands and Knees.

We commend your laid-back attitude, but ...

For the next month and a half, well-wishers will be cramming holiday cheer down your throat.

Literally: Mulled wine, pumpkin pies, and gallons of apple cider. Since you can’t beat them (although you’d like to), join them.

But make it ...

You may have chewed-down nails, chipped polish, and dishpan hands.

But they’re nothing compared to your feet. (The mere sight of which has been known to frighten small children.)

It’s time you walked those tired dogs to Honeydew. You’ll not ...