Teacher: Class, we have a guest speaker, Escuela.

Escuela: Buenos dias! Did you know that my name means “school” in Spanish?

(blank stares)

Escuela: Okay. I’m a WeHo taqueria opening today.

Insolent Student: There are a bazillion taco joints in this town. What makes you so special?

Escuela: Well, I’m the brainchild of Steve Arroyo, the visionary hombre behind Cobras & Matadors and Potato Chips. I’m impeccably dressed, with zinc tabletops, wormwood paneling, and a far-out ceiling installation of vintage bistro chairs.

My taco menu is more enticing than Salma Hayek’s decolletage (melt-in-your-mouth pork belly with pickled onion, roasted poblanos smothered in Monterey Jack cheese, crispy branzino with cabbage slaw). I also stay open past your bedtime, so tell your parents to swing by for late-night chips and guacamole.

Students (in unison): Yo quiero, Escuela!

Escuela: Lesson learned.

Escuela Taqueria, 308 North Stanley Avenue, between Beverly Boulevard and Oakwood Avenue, West Hollywood (323-939-8226).

Photo: Courtesy of Escuela Taqueria