The blood in our editors’ veins pumps red, white, and blue. As diehard compatriots, few things excite us like the chance to prove our dominance on the international stage. Here are the events we’re already warming up for.
Stephanie Almazan, Research Editor
Up, midair twirl (gasp), and down; and way up (ahh); and down. I’m a kid at heart, easily amused by circus acrobatics and anything that reminds me of a bounce house.
Tiffany Davis, Everywhere Editor
If you ask me, the only thing more riveting than an Olympic sprinter juicing scandal is an Olympic speed walker juicing scandal. Google it. There have been lots.
Hali Narins, Promotions Editor
Just when I was convinced sports were devoid of glamour (save for horse racing stands), along comes the event taken right out of a 1950s Esther Williams flick. Here’s hoping the USA shines (with red, white, and blue sequined swim caps) in London.
DeAnna Janes, Copy Editor
Though my pool entrances are limited to belly flop/dive hybrids and cannonballs, I meticulously critique every stray drop of water that pops up from the divers’ pikes and flips.
Jillian King, Production Coordinator
Sorry, America. I’m over Phelps. But I will be cheering 40-year-old Janet Evans’s return to the pool, eyeing Ryan Lochte’s front crawl, and mourning the absence of my man Aaron Piersol.
Lauren Berger, Senior Editor
Do you believe in miracles?! (As a lifelong L.A. Kings fan, I do.) With its aggressive forechecking, lightning-fast breakaways, and sanctioned on-ice boxing matches, hockey is three periods of pure adrenaline. Wait, are we talking about field hockey? Nevermind.
Lauren Lumsden, Video Editor
The average Olympic marathon runner covers 90 to 120 miles per week in the months leading up to the event. I’m lucky if I can break out the running man once a month at parties. These athletes go the distance.
Jordan Blumberg, NYC Editor
Sanya Richards-Ross is the favorite to win because she’s the fastest. She’s my favorite because a) we both went to the University of Texas, b) her wedding was on Platinum Weddings, and c) her bob/braid combo looked fantastic at the trials.
Emily Warman, Assistant Editor
I watch men’s beach volleyball like a scientist studies genomes: void of emotion and with total precision. There’s nothing about sweaty muscular bodies lunging after balls that piques my interest on an elemental level. Not this girl.
Larkin Clark, Deals Editor
One need only Netflix Forrest Gump to see that the sport is synonymous with precision, agility, and speed. Plus, I’m a sucker for small scale (see: cupcakes, pooches, gizmos). Some call it ping-pong; I call it a match made in heaven.
Stephanie Tabor, Social Media Intern
Props to the women who actually know how to drive a stick. I marvel at their ability to catapult through the air (that — and their biceps).
Jay Blades, Managing Editor
Why would I get excited about sparkles, corny-dramatic music, and sweet dance skills? You might as well ask why rainbows are magical or why it’s fun to dye your Maltese pink.
Jordan Blumberg, NYC Editor
My DVR is programmed to record anything titled “Gymnastics” but not “The Greatest Sport Ever.” That would be redundant.
Allison Hatfield, Copy Chief
Athletics? There’s an event called athletics? Aren’t all the events athletics? I’m confused.
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